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Emily Claire's Birth:
I was 23 years old, and had had a perfectly normal, relatively easy pregnancy. I was young, healthy (though anemic, and taking extra iron to compensate), and ready to meet my first child. My weight gain had been weird (lost 8 pounds in the first trimester, gained those 8 back in the second, and then gained 8 more in the third), and I was all baby belly. Friends told me I was impossibly little everywhere other than my belly, and that I looked great. I, of course, felt gigantic, and I was ready to have my body back! Everyone told me that first babies tend to come after their due date, so I wasn't expecting to meet her as early as I did.
I was 39 weeks and 1 day pregnant (according to my OB, 38 weeks and 6 days according to me) when, at around 4am on November 5th, 2010, I woke up with what felt like menstrual cramps. I tossed and turned in bed till 5-ish, trying to get comfortable, since it wasn't painful enough for me to really think anything of it. Finally, I couldn't take it anymore and got up. I tried to go to sleep in the rocking chair, thinking that maybe a change of positions would make it go away. It didn't. In fact, it got worse. I started to think that maybe this could be the beginnings of labor, so I got up, drank a big glass of water (in case the cramping was caused by dehydration), and got in the shower to try to relax. Well, "relaxing" worked, and the pain started getting more intense. I started getting excited.
So, I went out into the living room (my husband Theo was still asleep), sat on my exercise/birthing ball, and got on my laptop to keep my mind off the achy pain. It felt like someone had my lower back and abdomen in a vise, and would squeeze every now and then, causing a sickening pain similar to when I was on my period, only 10 times worse. At about 6:30, I realized the pains were really close together, so I started timing them. They were 4-5 minutes apart, and lasting at least 45 seconds. These were labor contractions.
At 7:30, I went into the bedroom and woke Theo. He remained conscious long enough to download a contraction timer app on his phone, turn on a movie in our bedroom to distract me while I timed the contractions, and fell back asleep. This was my first labor, and we were fully expecting a few false alarms before the real thing happened, so he wasn't really taking it seriously. Yet. At 8, I woke him again and told him the contractions had been regular for an hour and a half, and they were getting really intense and lasting longer. I don't think I've ever seen him move as fast as he did getting out of bed and dressed that morning!
I called my mom to let her know what was happening, got myself dressed, and we grabbed the hospital bag and headed off! We only lived about a mile from the hospital (yay!), so I was comforted by the fact that if this was a false alarm, or if they sent me away to labor at home for awhile longer, at least we didn't have a long drive. We got there around 8:30, and of course the nurse advised me the since this was my first baby, I shouldn't get my hopes up, I wasn't even at my due date yet, blah blah blah.....
At my last OB appointment, I had been dilated to 2cm and 75% effaced. When the L&D nurse checked me that morning, I was dilated to 3cm and 90% effaced. I was in labor and progressing! She hooked me up to the monitors and said they'd keep me for an hour and check me again. If I had progressed, they'd admit me; if not, they would send me home until things really got moving. An hour later, I had dilated another 1/2cm. They admitted me.
The pain started getting really bad around 10:30, and I consented to some iv pain meds. My plan had been to try for a natural labor, and I REALLY didn't want an epidural, but the pain was making me throw up uncontrollably, and I couldn't relax and breathe through the contractions (which were lasting upwards of a minute by then and frighteningly intense). The nurse told me the Stadol would help me relax and maybe get some rest, and quit tensing against the contractions. She also offered me anti-nausea meds to try to stop the vomiting. I consented. BIG mistake. The anti-nausea meds did absolutely nothing, and all the pain meds did was make me loopy and unable to focus. If anything, I felt worse.
It was around noon, when I was dilated to 4 1/2cm and fully effaced, when I caved in and asked for the epidural. I was still vomiting, even though there was nothing left in my stomach, and I was terrified I wouldn't be able to push if I was throwing up. My worst fear was (and still is) a C-section, so I was going to do everything I could to make sure I could push and have my baby vaginally. It was AGONY, waiting that half hour until they got my epidural going. I was loopy, confused, vomiting, in pain, and a nervous first-time mommy. I couldn't walk around to ease the pain, because I was hooked up to an iv for fluids due to the vomiting, so I was tossing in the hospital bed, trying to get comfortable.
My husband was fabulous, and stayed calm through it all, though he did have to sit down and avert his eyes with the needle went in for the epidural. Numbness came almost instantly, and within 5 minutes of being settled back into bed, I was numb from the belly down. I couldn't even wiggle my toes. The vomiting stopped, and I relaxed and tried to mentally prepare myself for the fact that I was going to meet my daughter in just a few hours.
They checked me around 1, and I was at 5cm. I had a couple visitors (my family, and a dear friend of the family), and kicked back and relaxed, watching the giant contractions (that I could no longer feel) on the monitor and laughing. At 2pm or so, I was dilated to 6cm and my OB broke my water, commenting that I had very thick membranes that probably wouldn't have broken on their own. (I didn't feel that breaking my water was necessary, as my labor was progressing fine, but I didn't question it at the time.) Half an hour later, I was feeling pressure, like I wanted to push, even through the complete numbness of the epidural. I told the nurse, who checked me, and informed me that I was completely dilated and ready to push! I had gone through transition, dilating 4cm, in half an hour! In shock, I allowed them to prep the room, put my legs up in the supports/stirrups, and the told me to start pushing. I did. WOW.
If you've never given birth, the only way I can describe pushing is to say that it's like having a massive BM. You use the exact same muscles in childbirth. My epidural was starting to wear off by then, so I did feel some pain, but I was so focused on pushing that it didn't even phase me. The OB barely made it in time. I pushed once for her, and Emily's head was out. Her little shoulders were so narrow that I didn't have to push again to deliver the rest of her, and she just slid right on out into the OB's hands, and was put right onto my chest! Theo was caught off guard since it happened so VERY fast, and his first reaction to seeing his daughter was, " Whoa! WHOA!" I couldn't help but laugh as I greeted my firstborn.
She was beautiful. Red, slimy, screaming, with a deformed head from being dropped so low in my pelvis for a month, and SCREAMING, but still the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen. They cleaned her off right there on my chest and let us bond for a bit while Theo cut the cord (which really surprised me, since he wasn't sure he wanted to), before whisking her away to weigh and measure her. She weighed 7 pounds, 1.8 ounces, and was 19 1/4 inches long. She was the picture of health, and I was completely in love with her.
I had a 3rd degree perineal tear (which, for some reason, my OB said was only a 2nd degree, but the midwife who delivered my 2nd child informed me that the scar tissue showed it had been 3rd) that needed stitches, but since I had the epidural, I didn't feel a thing. In fact, I didn't even realize I had torn and was getting stitches, because I was too busy having my picture taken and watching Theo take Emily's picture.
We stayed in the hospital until Sunday morning (Emily was born at 3:02pm on Friday) before taking her home. Recovering from the tear was the worst part of the whole thing, especially that first week. But Em is absolutely worth it. She's 2 years old now, and my pride and joy.
Even though her birth wasn't exactly what I had wanted it to be, and it spurred me to choose a midwife for my second pregnancy and delivery, I wouldn't change it, because I learned so much about myself and what's really important: a healthy mama and baby. We have that, and so much more!
Margaret (Meg) Elisabeth's Birth:
I was (am) 25, and at the time I gave birth, Emily was 25 months old. This pregnancy was much more difficult, though still a "healthy" pregnancy. I started having Braxton Hicks contractions at 12 weeks, and they never really went away. I was in pre-labor for 3 weeks before Meg was born, and it was so intense at one point that we actually went to the hospital, though I was sent home because it wasn't active labor. I walked around dilated to 4cm (wow!!) for 3 weeks before I really went into labor. Of course, the situation was made so much more difficult by the fact that I had a 2-year-old to take care of, and we were moving! We did all the packing and cleaning, found a house (our first house), and moved, all during my final trimester of pregnancy! 8 days after we moved in, I went into labor. Crazy!
At 2am on December 8th, 2012, I was 38 weeks and 6 days pregnant, and I woke up with serious contractions. Because I had been in pre-labor for so long, we were half an hour from the hospital, and I knew I was already dilated to 4, I didn't waste any time getting out my phone and timing my contractions. At 2:30, I got up, because they were already 3-4 minutes apart and growing more intense. I told Theo I was going to take a shower, just in case, but that I was pretty sure this was it. At 3am I was out of the shower, in terrible pain from the super-strong contractions, and I called my Mom and told her we were going to the hospital. My best friend is living with us right now, and had agreed to get up and keep an ear out for sleeping Emily until Mom could get to our house to take care of her. We got in the car and made the half hour drive to the hospital. I was seriously nauseous, and the contractions were far more intense than I had felt in my first labor. Car rides while in labor really suck! I was already considering the epidural.
When we got to the hospital at 3:45-ish, I barely made it into L&D triage before I threw up. I was devastated. I had wanted to do it without the epidural this time, but the pain was so bad, and I was vomiting again, so I told them I wanted it. They checked me, and I was at 4 1/2cm and completely effaced already. They moved me to a L&D room and called for the anesthesiologist to do my epidural.
When describing my previous labor and what that epidural felt like, they informed me that that had been a full-on SPINAL epidural, which was not what I had thought, and definitely not what I wanted this time. They gave me the low-dose walking epidural, so I would still be able to move around, and it was more likely to just dull the pain instead of completely removing it. I was thrilled, because I really wanted to go as natural as I could.
They gave me a little bit of a muscle relaxer in my iv (fluids again; dang that vomiting!) to help me relax while I was sitting perched on the edge of the bed, waiting for the epidural. Sitting like that was absolute agony, and I was having to vocalize through my contractions to cope with them. It was terrible. I had to stay still so they could monitor Meg's heartbeat (mandatory 20 minutes of monitoring before they could take it off), monitor my contractions, get my iv in, check my blood pressure, and prep me for the epidural. I was shaking so hard, I was afraid I would fall off the bed, and I couldn't focus on the contractions, because I was having to sign forms for the epidural, answer questions about my labor so far, and the like. If I had been left alone to just labor, I bet I wouldn't have needed the epidural. Looking back, if I had known just how close to pushing I really was, I probably would have called off the epidural and asked to walk around. But I didn't know how close I was. All I knew was that I was hurting, and I needed some relief so they could let me be.
I finally got the epidural and laid down on my side to let it set in around 5:15am. They kept checking to see if I was getting numb, but all that went numb were my thighs (big help), and the pain in my belly was dulled enough that I stopped vomiting. I still felt the contractions and the pelvic pain and pressure.
At 5:30, my eyes popped open wide, I grabbed onto the bed rail, writhing, and declared, "I need to push!" The nurse calmly answered that I was probably in transition and just feeling the pressure of the baby coming down, but I told her, "No. You don't understand. My body IS pushing, and I can't stop it. I HAVE to bear down!" She frantically called for the midwife (whose name, funny enough, was Margaret) and told me not to push if I could help it (HAH!) until she checked me.
Margaret arrived seconds later and checked me. I was fully dilated (with a very slight cervical lip) and my bag of waters was bulging. She said she was going to break my water, because the waters bulging out were preventing Meg's head from engaging properly, and then it would be time to push! In the 90 minutes it had taken them to get me into a room, get my epidural, and let me lie down, I had dilated from 4 1/2cm to a full 10cm! Talk about fast!
I pushed for about half an hour or so, sometimes on my side, sometimes on my back, depending on what felt right at the time. No stirrups or anything. Just me and Theo and a nurse holding my legs, an oxygen mask to help me breathe at one point (I did NOT like that, and ripped it off, much to the amusement of one of my nurses), and Margaret pushing back the cervical lip and coaching me. Theo gave me water when I needed it between contractions, and I just went into this zone and focused on pushing, vocalizing through the pain, and bringing my baby into the world.
I was not numb AT ALL in the pelvis. I felt everything. This was pretty much the natural labor I had wanted, except for my inner thighs and my belly (sort of), and it HURT. They aren't kidding when they say that you'll know when it's time to push. My body completely took over, and I couldn't have stopped pushing if I had wanted to. I think I said, "I can't," at one point, because pushing really, really hurts, but Theo kept updating me on my progress ("I can see her head," etc.), and it kept me strong. It was the most intense, emotional half hour of my life.
Finally, Margaret announced that her head was coming, and I gave one last hefty push. Margaret caught her head, held her there, and said, "Here you go, Mama!" Without even thinking, I reached down, grabbed my baby (who was still halfway inside me), and pulled her up onto my chest. I can't even begin to describe how amazing that was. Meg didn't even cry; she just laid there blinking up at me, and it was amazing. They waited a few minutes before wiping her down and suctioning her mouth and nose, and it was awhile before Theo even cut the cord. I think I held her for nearly half an hour before they took her to be weighed, and they gave her back mere minutes later. I loved it. She was 8 pounds, 6 ounces, and 21 inches long. Much bigger than her big sis, and boy, did they look alike right after birth!
I had torn again, right along the scar tissue from my previous tear, but this was only a 2nd degree. Margaret gave me a little shot to help numb the area while she repaired the tear, but I barely felt a thing anyway, I was so focused on Meg. Adrenaline is great! We only stayed in the hospital one night this time, since Meg was born so early in the morning (5:57am), and we just wanted to get home and settle in with our girls.
Recovery was much faster this time for some reason, but I'm not complaining! Meg is such a sweet baby, and she and her sister get along great so far!
Our family feels so complete (for now), and we're loving being a quartet!
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There we go! Both of my birth stories, in one gigantic blog post! If/When I have more babies, maybe I'll be more on top of things, and they'll get their own separate posts. =D
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